“Ask a Priest: My Husband Is Dying. Is This God’s Vengeance on Me?”

Q: I walked away from my religious vocation years ago and ended up getting married (much later) to a wonderful, loving man. Now my husband is dying of cancer, and I’ll be a widow with no family. Could this be happening to me because I turned my back on God so many years ago? – H.

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC

A: I’m sorry to hear about your husband. It must be heartbreaking to see him suffer.

You shouldn’t see his illness, however, as a divine act of vengeance.

God respected your free will when you didn’t pursue religious life. And he respected your free will when you married.

This might simply be a case where you are learning in a very sobering way that marriage, too, has its crosses.

Lots of wives who never felt a call to religious life also have to tearfully watch their husbands struggling with terminal illnesses. Couples are no strangers to suffering.

This is a moment to intensify your prayers and support for your spouse. Pray that both of you make it to heaven.

And even if marriage wasn’t God’s perfect will for you, it can still be a path to holiness if you live it well.

Count on my prayers for you and your husband.

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